Pirates, Werewolves, and Drunk Raccoons

I find myself alone in my house again, pacing and checking the locks. I live in a small town that is not known for crime, and nestled in the mountains hushed and chilled with snow it leaves an impression that is completely separate from the one my over active imagination has conjured up. I imagine madmen clawing at my windows, drunk and angry passersby begging for a chance to tackled and maim a young girl, pirates and bloodthirsty werewolves even. I make up excuses to myself, because I am alone, to avoid going to sleep as I listen to loud french hip-hop in an effort to make anyone passing think I was holding an exciting party. When I go outside for a cigarette I open my eyes wider, thinking it lets in more light, and attempt to develop cat-like night vision. I keep my hand on the door handle. These paranoid habits are not learned through experience, but vicariously from far too many movies and novels where things go bump in the night. Rather, it is not so much creatures, for I feel that I might have the power to gain their favor through some previously unseen charm, but the human beings that I live among in the daylight. Their dark hearts are concealed by their tooth baring grins as they hold doors open and offer up the last seat to an elderly woman. You, honor student, under the cover of dark may be more deviant than America's Most Wanted. Aren't the stories always, "Johnny was such a good boy, sang in the church choir. I just can't believe he chopped up his girlfriend and pureed her to feed to his dog" or "Susie and her family seemed so happy, bludgeoning the mail man with a baseball bat was uncharacteristic, such a nice lady" The uncharacteristic, the unexpected, these things come out at night. It's irritating when the old "things are the same as day time, just less light" argument comes out. I say nay nay, and bullshit my friend. The cover of dark brings out another side of people, like a mask on Halloween lets us pretend we are another character, develop another persona. Put on a uniform and you can be another person. The night is nature's costume, and as it is unnatural for us to be awake at night (our terrible night vision explains this) humans are like raccoons with rabies at night, drugged with the delirium of darkness. So yeah, I'm afraid to be alone at night and it's not irrational; I have my reasons.